Have you ever experienced a toxic relationship, whether it be a family member, friend, co-worker or partner, in which the other person sucks your energy dry? I have, and it is not pleasant. This person would enter the room, and I could immediately feel my walls go up. I suppose this was an energetic protection system that was happening subconsciously. My body was trying to protect me from their negative energy. Some people refer to the toxic person as an energy vampire. They tend to live in a lower vibration and feed off of your higher vibration.
According to an article related to this topic, https://lonerwolf.com/types-energy-vampire/ “An energy vampire is a person who feeds off your emotional, or psychic energy. People who display energy vampire traits generally lack empathy, sensitivity, and emotional maturity.” In my case, this person lacks the latter. “As a result of the pain or insecurity they feel inside, energy vampires are addicted to preying on the vitality of others as an attempt to heal their inner suffering.”. The article goes on to state that it is important to realize that these people are often inadvertently doing this because they are suffering so much pain inside. This person may rely so much on using others’ energy, they forget how to create their own.
Now, I am an extremely empathetic person who has developed a heightened sensitivity to people and things. I believe that opening up spiritually and removing blocks dissolved my walls that one can normally put up to thwart such negative energy. In addition, if my vibration reaches a lower level, then like attracts like, and I am unknowingly attracting this negative person into my life. Looking back on it, I can recall a few relationships where I was the source of energy for the other person. So, how do we know if someone close to us is one of these energy vampires? Here are a few clues:
- You feel a wall go up when around them
- You are completely drained after being in their presence
- You suddenly feel anxious, nauseated or get a headache around them
- This person uses guilt or manipulation to get their way
- This person does not take responsibility for their actions
- This person does not return favors or reciprocate in the relationship
It is important to note that we all, at some point in our lives, could have inadvertently been an energy vampire. So, it is important to reserve judgment (which is difficult for me in this situation), but instead to offer compassion and send love and light. In my case, it was extremely important to put up boundaries. I knew deep in my heart that creating boundaries was crucial, but I delayed it because this person meant so much to me. I have to remind myself that in order for that person to grow and develop the ability to create their own higher vibration, I must remove and distance myself. Yes, they can always prey on a new victim, but I remain hopeful that one day they will find self-love and learn to feed off of their own high energy state.
In the meantime, there are important tools that one can use in order to protect their energy from the vampires and toxic people in general:
- Set Boundaries and distance yourself
- Protect your energy prior to entering a room (imagine a white bubble of light surrounding your body or a full coat of armor, like I do sometimes!)
- Ask for help from your angels (Arch Angel Michael can offer protection)
- Carry a protective crystal, such as Black Turmaline (any dark-colored or black stone will repel or dissolve negative energies)
- Maintain a high vibration through meditation, exercise, and a healthy diet
- Rest and Recharge
- Use sage or palo santo to cleanse you or your space after contact with them
- Connect with your higher self and ask to be raised to a higher plane prior to interacting with them
- Take a salt bath
- Ground yourself
I often wonder when this person started feeding off of my energy…and unfortunately, I think it has been a long time. I too am to blame for this situation, because I have allowed it to happen for so long. I didn’t realize I was enabling an energy vampire because they are not all bad people. In fact, some can be quite charming and can easily disguise their inner struggles and self-hatred. You almost feel sorry for them and inevitably feel a sense of responsibility for their happiness. Due to my deepening spiritual practice and inner work, I now realize that it is their path and lesson in life to create their own happiness and self-love.
I mourn my relationship with this individual, but my spiritual beliefs give me a reassuring perspective about the deeper meaning behind this kinship. I believe that without these people, we may not learn valuable lessons. Perhaps they chose this role in our lives to teach us something? If that is the case, then in my eyes, they are ultimately the stronger person because of their sacrifice. I think we too are their teachers, providing a lesson on self-love and self-reliance.
Regardless of these life lessons, we still have human egos that need to survive on earth. In order to have the best experience, we have every right to protect ourselves and our families from these individuals. I am hopeful that things will get better, and I will be able to rekindle a positive relationship with this person. However, if it is not in the cards during this lifetime, I am willing to accept it.
Have you ever been a victim of a toxic person or energy vampire? Please comment below, I would love your feedback!